Growing up, my mom would always make my sister and I a homemade breakfast every day before school. It wasn’t until I was older and had a family of my own that I realized what a blessing this was…not only for us, but for her as well as our mother. Recently, I was reminded again by my son Matt.

As I might have mentioned in other blog posts, my son Matt turns 18 next week along with an accelerated High School graduation. He then starts classes at a local college the following week. Time is flying by and it got me thinking.

Over the years, I would wake my daughter Megan and Matt before school and make them breakfast just like my mom did with me. At times, if I’m being honest, it was an inconvenience. Many days I didn’t feel like doing it and often I didn’t feel appreciated. In many ways, it became an obligation or “have to”. Eventually, Megan went off to college in 2018 and I have been just doing this for Matt since then.

This past morning, as I got him up at 6:20am for school and to make his breakfast as usual, something felt different. My mind wandered. Maybe it’s because it’s a New Year, maybe it’s because I’ve had two weeks to reflect on my life and feel grounded again, or maybe it’s because off all the milestones Matt is reaching over the next 2 weeks. Whatever the reason, the breakfast routine didn’t feel like an obligation or burden that morning. It no longer felt like a “have to”. Ironically, as he sat down for breakfast, he paused and said:
“Only 9 more breakfasts dad. Once I graduate from High School, you won’t “have” to do this for me anymore.”

I froze. Somehow, he had read my mind and he was right! I wouldn’t “have to” do it anymore! This phase of our lives was almost over and suddenly I was sentimental.

“Wow, you’re right! I can’t believe time is going by so fast. You know I love making you breakfast and will do it anytime you want”, I said. “Grammy Rumenapp used to do it for me so I did it for you and Megan. Someday you’ll do it for your kids and you’ll think of me like I do her.” I continued. “Let’s celebrate by taking you out to breakfast on your last day before school.” He agreed that would be great.

As he finished breakfast, and eventually drove to school, I couldn’t help but think about how this moment suddenly flipped my mindset from “have to” to “get to”. How many things in my life had I missed in the present because I perceived them as “have to” (obligations) versus “get to” (blessings)? How many routine tasks do I overlook because I am worried about the future or regretting the the past? Suddenly it was clear. Breakfast was a privilege. An honor. A luxury. No wait, better yet… a “get to”, not a “have to”.
I don’t remember the last breakfast I made for Megan in High School unfortunately, but Matt’s “last” breakfast will now remind me of the daily blessings I “get to” do as their dad.